42 weeks tomorrow! (thanks to my awesome OB)

Remember that post I made calling my OB "Doctor Butthole"? Well, I totally take it back... even though he is still a major smart ass, he is no bigger one to me than I am to him. ;)

I say "I take it back" because I honestly expected him to be basically forcing me into the hospital, using that dreaded "I" word: "induction". I guess I have been wrong numerous times about assuming things with him, and I feel bad about it but he understands.

When I told him I didn't want to have my cervix checked (from 35 weeks all the way until just last week), all he said was, "Okay, so how are you feeling?" He didn't even ask why or try to convince me that I needed to. He just shrugged it off. His nurse practitioner, on the other hand, was just the opposite; she was like, "Well, I kinda have to because we won't know if you're going to be making any progress if I don't." Lady, that was at 35 weeks... You must think I'm an idiot. Good luck getting my pants off. Needless to say, she just gave me the sing-song-voice "Okaaayyyy" and wrote down on my little chart that I had "refused a cervical check". I then informed her that Dr. Childs knew I wasn't going to be having one, and she just rolled her eyes. I don't like her.

So, my most recent appointment on the 3rd was when I expected him to want to schedule me for an induction for the 7th, which would be when I turned over to 42 weeks. At my appointment on the 27th, when asked what happens after the 7th, his original reply was, "There is no 'after the 7th'", and I just sighed... He knew, though, and has all along, that I'm more interested in letting Keeli decide when she's ready than adhering to protocol and basically forcing her out. I have had a healthy, no-risk-at-all pregnancy and Keeli has been growing and developing like a champ. So, at my last appointment, he asked how I was and I told him I was just tired from being up all night (at the sewing machine, haha). He told me to go home, get some rest, and we'd wait on the NST until Monday. I looked at him all shocked-like, "I thought you weren't going to 'let me go' past Sunday? I thought you would try forcing me into the hospital???" His reply: "I never said that. I know you're both healthy and I know we've decided to wait on her to tell us when she's ready."

I LOVE MY OB!!!

What I don't love, though, are women who only mean well, can't help how little they actually know about birth, and insinuate that something is wrong with me by wanting to stay pregnant until Keeli is ready. It seriously astonishes me some of the things women ask me...

"He's not letting you get induced?"
"Aren't you miserable; don't you just want her out?"
"He's making you go until she comes on her own?!"
"What happens if she doesn't come on her own?" (<-lol)
"When are you scheduled to have her?"
"About time for that c-section, huh?"

What the hell? What is going on these days???

Do we induce the hatching of an egg? Do we rip rose buds open to "help" them bloom? Would you pull a butterfly from its chrysalis? NO. God, nature, and the developing organism decide when the right time to emerge is.

Where has that gone? :(

Luckily, I think Dr. Childs sees that I am educated, prepared and, if nothing else, headstrong as to what I want and don't want for my baby. He recognizes that I know what I'm talking about and that I've invested time in my health and in learning all I can about pregnancy and childbirth (and that I'm not just saying that I want this, this and this "just 'cause"). I feel like he respects me and trusts the decisions I'm making, and hasn't tried to pull the whole, "I'm the doctor; you're not qualified enough to make these decisions."

Although he did piss me off that one time with the, "Yeah, you consulted Dr. Google" thing, when I came back the next week with my little pile of research and typed report in-hand in a little purple folder, he took the time and slowly skimmed over every page.
"Okay. You are totally in charge unless something goes absolutely wrong, then I'm in charge." "Well, yeah, I'd kinda want you to be; that's what we're paying you for."
And then he hit me on the head with my chart. :D

Before, I had worried about being able to stay calm upon arriving at the hospital because of how intrusive I expect the nurses will be or how pushy they'll be or how they'll want to bug me with unnecessary interventions... But Dr. Childs signed my Birth Preferences sheet. All my Doula really has to say to them is, "Look, he knows what she wants and he is fine with it. Leave us alone."

I have learned, both on my own and in my Hypnobabies class, that if I don't feel safe while I'm in my birthing time, that my body will instinctively slow its processes until I do. Luckily, I don't have to worry about that anymore thanks to how unexpectedly cooperative my OB has been and him proving to me that he has faith that my body and my baby will know what to do.

I am very, very grateful. :)

Last Minute "Gotta-Do-RIGHT-NOWs"

I logged into my BabyFit account today to enter in the last few things I had eaten and my exercises for the day before heading downstairs to unwind for the night. I went to my home page, where I typically watch the counter for my "due date". It read, "Only 19 more days to go!" I knew "the time" was drawing nearer and nearer, but it didn't hit me until today... and I feel like I still have SO MUCH to do.

This may seem a little obsessive, but I don't care. I am writing this blog entry to physically map-out my plan for the rest of this week so that I (hopefully) will get these things done. By Sunday, I will have somewhere around 13 days left until Keeli's arrival. Here's what I have left to do so far (and I could technically do it all in one day if I so chose, but that's highly unlikely):

• Call the remaining pediatricians on my list and .pdf directory to set up additional consultations, since I obviously had far different views from the first one I interviewed.
• Set up an appointment for proper infant seat installation inspection at BabiesRUs. (I used to work there!)
• Call the child care centers on my list around Ooltewah to set up interviews/pay retainer deposit for when I return to school in January (though I am considering staying at home with her the entire first year) Forget this part entirely, as I am going to stay home with her until next fall when she will be a year old.
• After phone calls, I need to pick up the two parcels I have waiting on me at the Post Office. This will get done first, more than likely, even if it doesn't make sense route-wise to do so; it's a big shipment of more cloth diapers!!! :)
  
• Buy the items on the list I made (complete with pictures, haha) on the blue laptop. Shop The Dollar Tree first for smaller items, then Target (with $50 gift card), then Wal-Mart if absolutely necessary.
  
• Force Dad to let me have a clothesline so that I can buy that, have it installed, and feel "ready" for diaper duty. He keeps dodging me on this.
• Fill-out, address, apply postage to and mail my Thank You cards for those who attended my baby shower/sent gifts in the mail. There are tons of them. I keep putting it off but if I don't do them before she gets here, I know I will never get them done.
• Add new items from shopping to hospital bags for when it's "time".
• Condense number of hospital bags if I can. Right now there are a total of 7 in various sizes, and I also have to take my birthing ball and pillows. The only problem I can foresee with downsizing is that everything I'm packing, I will probably need. DOWNSIZED, but still have all the essentials.
  
• Wash pocket diapers. I am trying to wait on all of them to arrive first so that I can do one big wash, but who knows when they'll all be here. I am currently waiting on twenty more, fifteen of which I believe are in the shipment mentioned above that I will be picking up tomorrow.
  
• Finish sewing newborn AIO's and a few more newborn fitteds.

Now that I'm seeing all of this in writing, I think it makes it seem a little more manageable. It at least gives me something to refer to.

Nevermind; it seems like a lot still. Jeez. I better get in bed so I can wake up before 10am tomorrow. =)

36 Weeks & 3 Day Ultrasound

It's kind of sad, because I know this will be the last ultrasound I'll see of her (and possibly the last ultrasound I'll ever have). Today is July 1st, and in around thirty days, give or take a few, Keeli will be here in my arms!!!

My appointment was with my OB's nurse practitioner. She was thrown for a little bit of a loop, I believe, when I told her I'd rather she didn't "check" me. She asked three different times throughout the rest of my appointment "Why not?", and I just shrugged her off every time. "Oh, there are various reasons...", and the like. She also wanted to tell me how things are going to go for the rest of my pregnancy and once I come to the hospital, and I just politely nodded, while thinking to myself, "How will you know? You're not even going to be there!" She also said something along the lines of how it's important for them to check me so they will know when to "expect" me to go into labor, and I declined, once again, and told her my baby will let me know when she's ready. So annoying.

In better news- This baby girl has a TON of hair!!! I have included below a picture of it, and it's pretty obvious if you know what to look for. It is all over her little head, and the US tech said she hadn't seen a baby with that much hair in a while. She is also head down (vertex) and facing my back (anterior). She is preparing for launch! That was the news I went to my appointment today wanting to hear; I was so afraid she had flipped back to breech, even though she has been head down since about my 28th week or so. All those cat and cow stretches and time spent on my birthing ball, I like to think, encouraged her to stay in that position. I get more and more excited every day, and the days turn into weeks so quickly here recently. I can't wait to meet her!

Dear Doctor Butthole,

I met with a prospective pediatrician yesterday, and was not happy with what I learned... I left that appointment in tears from frustration. She insinuated that, because I was delaying the Hepatitis B vaccine and refusing the vitamin K shot altogether, I must not care about my baby suffering brain damage or contracting a disease and dying because of what I chose for her. Needless to say, I will not be using her for my daughter.

I have an appointment with my OB tomorrow. He has been mostly supportive of what I have asked for as far as Birthing Preferences. When it came to the shots, however, he simply gave me the run-around, saying, "Well, that happens immediately; every baby gets them; it's just routine". No, it won't happen immediately, THIS baby will not get them, and I guess I will have to take extensive measures to snap you out of your routine even if only for ONE birth. Thank GOD I have a Doula who's got my back and a very informed, don't-f*ck-with-me mom, both of whom will support me and make sure my wishes are followed.

I plan on including below the research I am taking with me to my OB appointment in the morning. When I had mentioned to him last week about how I wanted to delay Hep B and didn't want vitamin K at all for her based on some research I had done, he said something along the lines of, "Yeah, you consulted Dr. Google". What the ****??? No. She's not getting them. She doesn't need them. So, no thanks... And, here, read this when you're on the toilet next if you're interested in what Dr. Google had to say.

Beautiful Pregnancy

Today was my maternity photo shoot and, needless to say, I was not excited about having my picture taken. I sometimes feel like a whale, especially when there are cameras around. I used to want the "perfect body", but I had no idea how hot I actually was until I got pregnant. Don't get me wrong, though; I love my pregnant body. I hope that after Keeli is born, I will proudly wear my new stretchmarks as badges of honor, but that isn't to say I will be showing them off. I felt really self-conscious in front of the camera today, but after seeing a few of the shots before editing, I am happy to say that I think I do make quite an attractive pregnant woman.

After my photo shoot, I went to my childhood friend's bridal shower. I saw a few girls I had grown up with for the first time in ages, babies in their arms. They all cooed over my pregnant belly and told me I looked great. For the first time since I ballooned into a walking baby-factory, I believed them.

I haven't had any complaints and have been blessed enough to have an uneventful, healthy pregnancy. I (typically) eat only whole, natural foods and I exercise daily. I have cute maternity clothing and can still wear some of the shirts I wore before I got pregnant, although they are more form-fitting now... jeans are another story, haha.

I suppose I am getting somewhat emotional about this because I know that in around four weeks, it will be over. I can already tell I am going to miss being pregnant, as much as I am dying to meet Keeli and have her in my arms. I have promised myself to enjoy every little movement, every little nudge or kick, every little hiccup until she is born (and I will even gladly cooperate with my sciatica). Being pregnant has been the best experience of my entire life to date, and I thank my God for blessing me with this wonderful journey that many women are denied.

My (soon-to-arrive) Daughter's Nursery

Since I made this video, we have changed it a little... Added more little things here and there. The look we were going for was originally 40's Glamour-like, and I hope we landed somewhere in that ballpark. I think it's so pretty, and it's something she can grow into as well. I love baby stuff, don't get me wrong, but I can't stand pink, pink, pink everything. She can be a girl without being obnoxious about it! :)

Hyper-Nesting Phase 2

Today, I may have seriously overdone it. Well, not really, but if you ask my mom, I did.

Since we moved into this house when I was 16, the two-car garage here has been FULL of total JUNK. We somehow managed to get one side of it clean enough so my mom could park her car inside. Today, I cleaned out the rest... ALL of it.

This entire little project was completely involuntary. I had already swept and hosed-out the side where my mom's car is usually parked; Maggi had pee-peed in that spot and I didn't want it to start smelling. That task alone almost had me exhausted. Then, the guys from the furniture store came and dropped off the new couch for the downstairs. Upon going back into the garage, I discovered they had knocked over one of the pots full of soil, and dirt was everywhere. I was a little ticked-off, but after they just hauled off a couch and put a new one in (and moved the stuff in the garage so they could do so) all by themselves, I figured I'd just clean it up. That's where it all started. I couldn't effectively sweep because of all the crap in the way, so I decided to move it all. I picked up box after box, sorted through old pictures, old toys, old trophies, put all of my step-dad's things into two giant tubs and moved those... I did it all.

Mom and I had been saying for a couple months (at least) that we were going to clean it out together so that I could get my car into the other side. It needed to be done, not only because that's what a garage is supposed to be for, but so that Keeli and I could get inside without dealing with the outside elements during the hot summers and cold winters. Mom came home today and was absolutely surprised, and then worried. (I also hadn't eaten until around 3p.m. because I had been cleaning since around 10a.m.) "Go upstairs, sit down, let me fix you something to eat, get off your feet, your ankles are so swollen". She's so sweet.

But then she told me: During both of her pregnancies with my older brother and sister, a week before they were born, she had a major spurt of energy that came out of nowhere except the feeling that certain things HAD to be taken care of RIGHT THEN. She asked me, "Are you sure this baby isn't coming anytime soon?" And I just laughed. She better not; she still has lots of growing to do!!!

I will be 36 weeks tomorrow, due around July 24th. I would really love to carry her as long as possible, and my doctor is even going to let me go until August 7th if we both stay as healthy as we have been. I don't want to not be pregnant, despite wanting to meet her so badly.

My arms are kind of sore, and I'm waiting on eBay to tell me I won the bid on the cloth diapers I was talking about yesterday (fingers crossed!). Just thought I'd document my recent triumph over Mount Trashmore in our garage. :)

Hyper-Nesting

According to my OB, my "due" date is on July 24th. Today is June 24th, meaning I have somewhere around 30 days to try and get everything else in order for the arrival of my angel! I feel great as far as having everything I need. The only thing I am still waiting on is the travel system, and my sister is planning on buying it for me from one of our friends once she begins feeling better. If worse comes to worse (I go into "labor" before we have one), I'm sure my dad will go and pick one up.

There is, however, one thing I am concerned about... Diapers. I have this awful nagging feeling that I don't have enough. Until today, my mom had assumed we had somewhere around 50 pre-folds in our arsenal, along with 10 nappies, subtly varying in style but all OS pockets. She is super "old school" and doesn't see why I feel the need to buy the nappies. Her words to me are always the same: "I don't see what you have against the pre-folds and plastic pants". It's not that I have anything against them, they worked just fine for my siblings and I growing up, but the nappies just seem so much more convenient... not to mention CUTER!



It turns out, though, after inspecting Keeli's closet, she only has 34 pre-folds and 10 nappies. I almost started hyperventilating. That is probably only enough for 2 days, and I'm not about to be doing diaper laundry that often and increase the financial burden we are already imposing on my parents (water bill). The pre-folds we bought, although not organic and maybe not even of the best quality, came 12 to a pack for around $10. I am planning on buying probably 3 more packs of those, but that doesn't solve my nappies problem.

I have been looking around on Ebay, and currently have bids on 4 more OS pocket nappies and if no one bids against me, I can get all 4 for $1. That would be a rare occurrence; prices always rise to around $10/nappy, which is still better than buying at my local store. The bidding for these diapers ends in 2 days, and I'm just praying no one finds them!!!

I have sewn 6 of my own for less than $30. I really enjoyed the process, but my ankles and feet did NOT! They are really cute, AI2/OS, and very economical. Now, I just wish I could pay someone to sew the next batch so that I don't have to be sitting so long... and I'd have to watch them and nit-pick at them to make sure they're doing it right. :) Here is how they turned out.

I would love to be able to buy more material and make more. I can just imagine how proud I'll feel when I get to tell people "I made those myself!". I am hoping, though, to luck-out with this bargain I found on Ebay, and then use the money I saved to make 6 more of my own... That would put me at 20 diapers.

Ugh...

So, this is a summary of my current obsession: Diapers. Either way, I know she will be provided for, even if it's by the less-cute pre-folds and plastic pants. We are blessed.