I take a lot of naps these days, more so within the past couple of weeks. (Hopefully that means I'm resting up because I'm about to go into my birthing time. Who knows when that will actually happen, but anyway.) So, I nap a lot. It isn't typically deep, deep sleep because of how frequently it occurs, but I do have the ability to attain lucidity if I so choose and even project if I am feeling particularly froggy.
Today, I initially sought projection more so out of boredom than anything else. It turned out basically blowing my damn mind in the end.
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I was on the couch downstairs, taking a break from the sewing machine because it was really starting to piss me off. I now hate sewing with PUL. The needle would go into both the fabrics, everything was threaded correctly even, but it just wasn't making a stitch. When I realized how stressed I was allowing myself to become over the situation, I decided to try and relax, and maybe take a little nap.
So I'm there on the couch, totally comfortable, paying attention to my breathing and the white noise of the air-filtering vent. I let my head fall where it may, my muscles become limp, my eyes roll. I decide I am going to astrally project, simply because I haven't done so in about a week. So upon becoming totally relaxed both mentally and physically, I turn my focus to my heartbeat. When I am attempting a projection, this is my staple, my anchor, much like a metronome. I can't explain the feeling I get once I realize that my body is totally asleep and my mind is still very much awake, but I notice it and, as usual, my heart starts pounding furiously. This is when the eyes of my astral body open (while my physical eyes remain closed), and I look around the room...
I sit up. I look down at my legs, my flat stomach. My astral body isn't pregnant; it hasn't been this entire time. It's an odd, rather lonely sensation but I know it isn't "real". I turn around and see a view of my physical body as though I was sitting on top of myself. I smile. "YES."
I get up whilst moving as slowly as possible. My "skin" vibrates. My lips are numb. My hair is flickering in the air around me as though there is a breeze. I look at my physical body and I see my daughter kicking, random knots forming on my stomach as she stretches out and rolls around. I decide to stay as close as possible to my body (and her) because I don't like the feeling I get when I venture too far out. Not to mention how easily distracted I become upon traveling and my bad sense of direction...
"I'm just going to go into the garage, but it won't be the garage... I will open this door and instead of concrete and walls, I will step into my world. It will be my special, safe place. It will be a field surrounded by trees on either side of me, with the curvature of the Earth in view much as the ocean appears to showcase it, but more prominent. I will see every constellation in the sky above me, numerous planets teeming with life within contact's reach, comets, and there will be an almost subsonic, continuous ringing of Ohm radiating throughout every fiber of my being and vibrating into all the things surrounding me, consuming me and connecting me... So much so that I feel as though I will be able to burst into pure energy and become part of everything."
And so I did, and so it was.
I am sitting there in my little fairy circle (a circle of wild mushrooms occurring in nature [Google it, it's real]), attempting to absorb this beautiful sensory overload. I already miss my daughter. I know in my waking life I have only been here for a few minutes, but taking the time to note only a few details of this place feels like eternity. Time doesn't exist here, but "here" isn't where I necessarily belong. I have to go back. I have to keep checking behind me to make sure the door to my living room is still there. God forbid...
While I'm thinking all of this to myself, I sense something's out of place. Someone's here. Someone who has not been invited here is here with me. They're to my right. My senses go on alert. My mind races. I clench my jaw, and I can almost feel my pupils dilate. My entire right side is starting to feel really warm. I wonder if I should even look over there and acknowledge them or act as though I have no idea they're even around. I sense it's a guy. It's a guy I know. "Shit, fine." I look over. A cool breeze surrounds me and I smile and become calm almost immediately.
This guy is SO welcome here...
I almost laugh when I realize who it is, and I want more than anything to run to him and embrace him, to show him everything, to introduce him to everyone and connect with him on this level the way we had been trying to for so long. "He figured it out; he's here. He finally got the hang of it!"
There is one thing, though, that is bothering me- We didn't plan this. I had no idea he'd be here, and I've always considered it quite intrusive of someone to show up unannounced in my waking life and even more so on the astral plain. It's like being interrupted during a prayer or a car alarm going off right outside a church window. It's annoying. It's even dangerous. He is walking toward me, and I anticipate being able to interact with him in this way but I also know II Corinthians 11:14 by heart. I have to go. I smile at him, but I have to go. Who knows who (or what) this could really be. I have already learned my lesson in this department the hard way. I can't be as careless now that I have Keeli.
I turn to see the door and quickly float to it, my white peignoir flowing in the wind, the grass tickling my feet as I pass.
The door opens, and it all happens quickly from there, per usual. I spot my physical body and my eyes see what I could only describe as a rapid "zooming-in", as with a camera. I violently snap back into my body, and I physically awake almost with a gasp.
I touch and rub my belly, my daughter. She kicks in response. I sigh in relief. I'm back. The rest of my body remains still as I regain physical consciousness.
I am snapped out of this relaxation completely when my phone goes off on the floor beside the couch, alerting me of a new text message. I wait maybe a minute or two, because the sound of the ring itself causes my heart to jump and even startles me. I finally reach down, pick up my phone and open it.
It's him, and his message simply says, "Why'd you run off so quickly?"
...
THE HELL??!!
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